Obituary

How to list family in an obituary

List the family from the closest relationship outward: spouse or partner, children (with their spouses in parentheses), grandchildren, great-grandchildren, parents if living, siblings, then others the person was close to. Separate each group with a semicolon, name the people who died before them in a separate "preceded in death" sentence, and ask the family to approve the list before it is published.

Updated October 29, 2026 · Editorial lead: Jean-Claude Fatemian

Personalized obituary · $15 A full obituary, a newspaper version and an announcement, written from the facts you give.

Write my obituary · $15

Secure payment by Stripe · Apple Pay · Google Pay · no account, no subscription · Questions? Email us

On this page

The examples on this page were written for TributePen. The people, names and details in them are invented: use them as a starting point, never as someone's real story.

The usual order

The survivors sentence usually starts with "She is survived by" or "He leaves behind," then moves from the closest relationship outward:

1. Spouse or partner, often with the years together: "his wife of 51 years, Ann."
2. Children, in birth order, each with their spouse and city if you like.
3. Grandchildren, then great-grandchildren, by name or by number.
4. Parents, if they are living.
5. Siblings, with their spouses if you want.
6. Others: nieces and nephews, godchildren, a close friend or caregiver, a beloved pet if the family wishes.

A second sentence names the people who died before them: "She was preceded in death by her parents, John and Ruth Miller, and her brother, Tom." Keep that sentence for family members; it does not need the same detail as the survivors.

Punctuation that keeps the list readable

A survivors list is often the longest sentence in an obituary. Two rules make it clear:

• Semicolons between groups, commas inside them. "her children, Mark (Susan) Ellis of Phoenix and Julie (David) Carter of Tucson; five grandchildren; and her sister, Carol Hughes."
• Spouse in parentheses after the child's first name: "Mark (Susan) Ellis." If the couple uses different last names, give both in full: "Julie Carter (David Reyes)."

Blended families

There is no single correct wording; there is the wording the people involved recognize as true. Three common approaches:

• All the children together, when they were raised as one family: "his children, Amy, Josh, Kelsey and Ryan."
• Named as stepchildren, when that is how everyone thinks of it: "his stepchildren, Kelsey and Ryan Ortiz."
• "Bonus" or "the children of his heart", used by some families who want warmth without the word "step."

Divorce, remarriage and partners

• A former spouse is not usually listed among the survivors. When the person shared children with them, some families write "the mother of his children, Karen Hill" in the survivors sentence or leave her out entirely; follow what the children want.
• A spouse who died earlier goes in the "preceded in death" sentence: "She was preceded in death by her first husband, Walter."
• An unmarried partner can be listed first, like a spouse: "his partner of 22 years, Linda Ross."
• A widowed spouse who remarried is named with their current name if they are listed.

Hard cases

• A child who died before them: name them in the preceded-in-death sentence, with the same care as the living children: "her son, Daniel, in 1998."
• Estranged family members: the family decides. Leaving someone out is public and remembered; if you are unsure, a neutral listing without detail ("his son, Eric") is the safer choice.
• No close family: name the friends, neighbors or community who were their family: "He leaves behind the friends of the Tuesday chess club, who were his family for forty years."
• Pets: some families add a line at the end: "and his faithful dog, Biscuit." It is a family choice.

Before you publish

• Spell every name as the person writes it, including nicknames and married names. Text the list to each branch of the family and ask them to check their own line.
• Cities are optional; leave them out if anyone prefers privacy.
• Do not list addresses or anything that shows when a home will be empty.

For more cases (a spouse who died earlier, half-siblings, adopted children, a child who died before them) with wording options and what to check with the family first, our obituary workbook has a survivors chapter and a list to fill in by branch of the family.

You can fill in the survivors line, with every other part of the obituary, in the free fill-in-the-blank obituary template, which you can download for Word. If you would rather not write it yourself, we can write the full obituary from the facts you give for $15, including the family list exactly as you give it, a shorter newspaper version and an online announcement. For the order of the whole obituary, see how to write an obituary.

Common questions

Related guides

• How to Write an ObituaryWhat to include, in what order, and what to leave out.
• Free editable obituary template (fill in the blanks)Fill in the blanks; your draft assembles in the usual order.
• Obituary examplesNine samples, traditional to personal, with notes.
• Obituary for a fatherExamples for a veteran, a working man, and a quiet father.