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PDF guide · 2026 edition

What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book, a PDF guide

Cover of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"

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Sympathy, Thanks and Remembrance: the four wording guides, $49 (the 4 separately: $81)

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You receive
A 35-page PDF guide: 200 original sympathy messages, numbered, each with a note on when it fits, 3 complete condolence letters, 5 letters, texts and comments to adapt, 8 tables and worksheets, 7 checkboxes.
Format
US Letter PDF to read on screen or print at home, clickable table of contents, sources listed at the end.
Price
$24, one-time payment, taxes included · refund on request within 14 days.
Delivery
Download right after payment, and the link by email to come back to it.
For
Anyone who has to write a sympathy card, a flower card or a condolence note, for a friend, a relative, a coworker, a client or a neighbor, and the person who passes the office card around.

Most people holding a blank sympathy card are not short of feeling; they are afraid of writing the wrong thing. This wording book gives you 200 messages written for it, sorted by who died (a mother, a father, a spouse, a child, a sibling, a grandparent, a friend), by who you are writing to (a friend, a coworker, a boss, a client, a neighbor) and by situation (a sudden death, a long illness, someone you never met, a religious or a non-religious card, a late card), each with a note on when it fits. It also covers the funeral flower card, how to sign for a couple, a family or an office, three longer condolence letters, texts and comments, and a card planner to print.

Cover of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
The real cover of the guide (35 pages)
  • 35pages
  • 200original sympathy messages to choose from
  • 3complete condolence letters
  • 5letters, texts and comments to adapt
  • 8tables and worksheets
  • 7checkboxes

How we check

Verified, page by page

  • 108automatic checks run on the site before every update
  • 1official .gov pages read and cited, on October 30, 2026

Reviewed by industry professionals.

  1. Primary sourcesThis guide is built from the guidance of the U.S. Copyright Office.
  2. Every fact has its sourceEach guide lists the pages it relies on, with links, so you can check any point yourself.
  3. DatedSources read on October 30, 2026; each page shows when it was last updated.

What you will be able to do

  • Write a card in minutes, for any loss and any relationship, with the three small pieces almost every good message is made of.
  • Pick a message for the exact situation: a sudden death, a long illness, a person you never met, a religious or a non-religious family.
  • Sign it the right way, for yourself, a couple, a family, a team or a club, with a closing that matches how close you are.
  • Write the flower card in one line, with who it is from.
  • Write a longer letter to the people closest to you, with two letter outlines and three complete letters.
  • Send a text, an email or a comment that asks nothing of the family.
  • Write late, weeks or months after, without spending the card apologizing.

Who it is for, and who it is not for

For you if you want to write something better than a printed verse and "sorry for your loss", or if you are the one passing a card around the office.

Not for you if you only need a few lines for one card today: our free guide on how to sign a sympathy card and the page on what to write in a sympathy card have short examples.

What makes it different

Lists of sympathy quotes are easy to find; messages that fit a precise person and situation are not. This book sorts 200 messages written for it by who died, by who you are writing to and by what happened, with a note on when each fits, then covers the parts other lists skip: the signature, the flower card, the long letter and the late card.

The complete table of contents

The real table of contents of the guide, with its page numbers.

  1. Before you writep. 5The three pieces of a good message · How long to write · Words that tend to hurt · Card, text, letter or call · How to use the 200 messages
  2. Messages for close family lossesp. 8When their mother has died · When their father has died · When their husband, wife or partner has died · When their child has died · When their brother or sister has died · When their grandparent has died
  3. Friends, coworkers and people you know less wellp. 14For a friend · For a coworker · For a boss, an employee or a whole team · For a client or a customer · For a neighbor
  4. Messages by situationp. 18After a sudden death · After a long illness · When you never met the person who died · For a religious card · For a card with no religious words
  5. Funeral flower card messagesp. 22How a flower card is laid out · Short lines for the card · When the flowers go to the home instead of the service
  6. How to sign a sympathy cardp. 25Closings by how close you are · Signing for more than one person · Signing a group card at work · A few small rules
  7. Longer condolence lettersp. 27
  8. Texts, emails and comments onlinep. 30A few rules for messages on a screen
  9. When your card is latep. 32Late messages · Other ways to be late and still be there
  10. Card plannerp. 33Cards to send · Draft your message · Before you seal the envelope · Dates to write again
  11. Sourcesp. 35

A look inside: real pages of the guide

Page 8 of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
Page 8 of the guide, exactly as you will receive it.
Page 22 of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
Page 22 of the guide, exactly as you will receive it.
Page 25 of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
Page 25 of the guide, exactly as you will receive it.
Page 27 of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
Page 27 of the guide, exactly as you will receive it.
Page 33 of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
Page 33 of the guide, exactly as you will receive it.

In pictures

A bundle of old stamped letters beside a sprig of wild flowers
A bundle of old stamped letters beside a sprig of wild flowers. Photo: Vintage RS, CC0 1.0
A blank card clipped to a bunch of eucalyptus in a glass jar
A blank card clipped to a bunch of eucalyptus in a glass jar. Photo: Helena Hertz, CC0 1.0
A rural U.S. mailbox on a wooden fence post
A rural U.S. mailbox on a wooden fence post. Photo: Matt Bango, CC0 1.0

Illustrative photos, published by their authors under free licences.

Cover of the PDF guide "What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book"
What to Write in a Sympathy Card: The Wording Book
$24

The wording book for a sympathy card: 200 original messages sorted by relationship (a mother, a father, a spouse, a child, a sibling, a grandparent, a friend, a coworker) and by situation (a sudden death, a long illness, someone you never met, a religious or non-religious card, a late card), short lines for a funeral flower card, how to sign for a couple, a family or an office, three longer condolence letters, texts and comments, and a card planner to print.

Pay $24 and receive my PDF wording bookBy paying, you accept the Terms.

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Common questions

Are the 200 messages original?

Yes. They were written for the book, about invented people, and numbered so a family or an office signing one card can choose together. Each ends with a short note on when it fits, such as a coworker you do not know well, a sudden death or a late card.

Which relationships and situations are covered?

The loss of a mother, a father, a spouse or partner, a child, a sibling, a grandparent or a friend; cards for a coworker, a boss or employee, a client and a neighbor; a sudden death, a long illness, someone you never met, a religious card, a card with no religious words, and a card sent weeks or months late.

Does it explain how to sign the card?

Yes. Chapter 6 gives closings by how close you are, how to sign for a couple, a family, a team or a club, and how to run a group card at work.

Is there anything for a flower card?

Yes. Chapter 5 shows how a funeral flower card is laid out and gives 16 short lines, from family, friends, a school or a workplace.

What if I want my own message written for me?

The book gives you the words to write it yourself. If you would rather have a message written from what you tell us, the personalized sympathy message on TributePen does that.

Sources cited in the guide

Related guides

$24Full refund within 14 daysPay $24 and receive my PDF wording bookBy paying, you accept the Terms.